It is easy to rush into something, especially if things are going well in a relationship. Your brain thinks that if a little is good, a lot must be better. Unfortunately, life doesn’t always work that way and it is easy to get in over your head. The good news is, once you realize what you’ve been doing wrong, it is simple to fix. Here are signs you are moving too fast in a relationship.
Anxiety
When you’re moving too fast into a relationship, your mind will start to mess with your body. You’ll get a feeling of dread in your gut. Something will feel “off.” No matter how much you try and rationalize it away, this feeling of anxiety cannot be pushed away. This is your subconscious trying to get your attention. You can listen to it by finding a quiet spot and having a conversation with yourself, either in your head or by writing in a journal or diary. You can write a list of pros and cons, a list of questions and answers, or just write whatever comes into your head. If you are honest with yourself, brutally honest, what is bothering you will come out.
Neediness
Neediness is a secondary sign of anxiety that signals you are moving too fast in a relationship. If either you or your partner seems to need constant reassurance, promises of commitment, or to spend all your time together, it can actually be a sign you are moving too quickly. Sometimes, there is a tendency to rush into things when you feel any discomfort in a relationship. You feel uncertain, negative feelings about the relationship or the other person and instinctually press closer together to ward off rejection or the end of the relationship. Just because there are some negative feelings, doesn’t mean the relationship has to end. Pushing it farther than it needs to go, faster than it is ready, is a good way to end things prematurely, though.
Switch
Another sign you may be moving too fast in a dating relationship is when things switch from good to bad. Things were going fine. So good, in fact, that you decided to take things to the next level. Suddenly, things aren’t fine anymore. This can be a sign you’ve taken a step too early or you’ve brushed against some dormant feelings that need to be addressed. The biggest way to help any kind of relationship to succeed is to understand your own feelings and communicate them honestly to your partner. This is something couples spend their lives trying to perfect, so don’t be discouraged if it doesn’t come easily.
When you’ve rushed into a relationship milestone you weren’t ready for, you have only a few options. You can keep moving ahead and hope the awkwardness passes, you can take some steps back or even end the relationship, or you can talk with each other and find out what the other person is feeling. The last option is the hardest, but it is the only one that has the potential to give you relief and understanding and to lay the groundwork for a better relationship when you’re ready to move forward again.